Have you ever wondered what would be possible for you if you weren’t so susceptible to fears of rejection, failure and loss?
I’ve been thinking about this so much, because I am much more susceptible than I’d like to be. When the fear comes up, it’s like my whole being transmutes into this Loch Ness creature with black eyes that are completely immune to the light. All I can see are the worst lies I’ve ever imagined about myself. Fortunately now, because of the work I’ve been doing with my mind, I pass through the madness relatively quickly, much more so than previous versions of myself, and when I get to the other side, I can see so clearly how possessed I was by my pain body. (If you’re not yet acquainted with what the pain body is all about, I highly recommend Eckhart Tolle’s, A New Earth. It is one hella holy and resonating text).
Once I’ve returned back to myself, I often revisit the lies my mind had so tenaciously spun, partly to laugh at the absurdity of it all, and partly to become more aware for the next time that I find myself there.
Here’s a short rundown:
I fucked up.
I did/said something wrong.
I’m so repulsive and now people know, and now they can’t unknow.
I have unsolvable issues and am therefore trapped in my unlovability, and so of course so and so is going away and never coming back.
So and so is an asshole and intentionally causing me harm.
I am causing myself harm by associating with so and so.
The stories become so elaborate as I continue to stew in them, like I honestly can’t even believe how wildly out of control the tales spin out, not to mention the destructive behaviors and actions that my mind is advising me to do in order to solve them.
Which is the other thing that I’m learning when I’m caught in my pain body. Whatever I think I need to do to make it better, I need to actually do the opposite. Which 10 times of out of 10 is to DO NOTHING. The ego feels so self-righteous and so justified and so in the right when it’s all flared up. But when we are overcome with an inflamed ego growing bigger and bigger with each pain story, we’re not in the right. We’re in the lies. And any action that stems from an attempt to rectify the pain while in it, will likely be regrettable at best. Especially if it involves others. And so if you take one thing from this post, it’s to DO NOTHING when you want to call up so and so and air out all of your grievances. Wait and see if you still need to do that once you’ve passed your way through your Loch Ness state.
I’m writing about this because I know that I’m not alone in what I’m experiencing. I know that the pain body is such a shared human phenomenon, and even though I feel so ashamed of myself when I find myself overrun with fear, I don’t see any need to be in hiding about it. Especially because this message brings big bright and shining rays of hope (Merry Christmas), in the form of many reminders that we have so much more power than we so often think we have.
The power is in knowing that solving our external circumstances or getting what we want from someone else is not how we become more happy. The power is in knowing that we can only achieve genuine and sustained happiness when we put the effort in to recondition our minds, treating them like fine works of art --sculpting them, refining them, caressing them into becoming more geared toward forgiveness and patience and trust. We do this through spiritual practice. Through meditation. Through prayer. Through study. Through service. Through choice. We have the power to work wonders on our minds. We take the power back from our minds when we become objective observers of what the heck they’re up to.
The power is in coming back to the present moment (like right now for instance, I am typing words onto a screen at Identity Coffee sipping on a decaf cappuccino hearing ethereal music and the sound of the steamy-ma-bobber on the espresso machine, and several vocal tones speaking words that I’m not tuning into enough to interpret). This is the only thing that matters. Just this moment right here where I am is all there is. Why does being present matter?
Because the power is HERE. The fear is OVER THERE. The power is “I forgive myself for feeling like a crazy person yesterday.” The fear is, “Damnit, it happened again, I’m so fucked up, I’m never going to figure this out, blah blah blah.”
The power is in doing the opposite thing that the fear is urging us toward.
The power is in committing to the liberation of our minds first off and foremost and making all other commitments from the pure and loving and trusting spaces we’ve cultivated within.
The power is in taking full responsibility for our mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness. The power is in doing everything we can to not cast ourselves out of our own hearts, and if we slip up and accidentally do so, then the power is in calling ourselves back home as soon as we realize what we’ve done.
The power is in reorienting our view, taking the focus off of ourselves for a hot freaking minute and putting it on others. (Have you ever noticed that we’re all just kind of obsessing about ourselves all day long?) Instead, we can wish others happiness, and peace, and wholehearted certainty that they are loveable and loved and so capable of loving.
Can you imagine the bliss of being fully empowered? Aren’t you excited that it’s absolutely possible for each and every one of us?
I can’t even contain my joy when I feel into this potential.
We are all in this together, showing each other the way, and as my bestie reminded me the other day, walking eachother home. Let’s not forget that, kay?
May your mind know bliss and freedom.
And if at any point you’d like support with your mind control, you know how to get ahold of me. I’ve been diving deeper and deeper into this artform.
Happy Full Moon Solstice Sweethearts
(yay to days growing longer!),